42

The night before my 42nd birthday I couldn't sleep.  Not because I was worried about getting a year older but rather because I had spent time earlier in the evening writing a desires list for the next day and couldn't wait for it to begin.  That got me thinking about why I wasn't creating every day in such a fashion.  Why am I not living my life in a way that causes such excitement?

I awoke the next day to a quiet house and two pots of flowers with a handmade happy birthday sign.  Breakfast was delivered to me alongside a chai tea from a friend and colleague.  Students made me a birthday hat to wear and I received hugs all day long.  I painted with my little guy and was completely present in the moment.  My older son began creating with clay and the evening rounded out with snuggles on the couch and Moana.  We ate juicy burgers and delicious fries and it was perfect.  I felt connected.  Life was simple and full of love.

Perhaps my 43rd year will continue on with such love and presence and be filled with simple joys.  I feel so much gratitude for the people in my life and the opportunity for so many beautiful moments.  It is time to be thankful and continue to live each day to the fullest.

What is perfect?

• waking up before 6:30 a.m. feeling fully rested and excited to begin my day
• listening to a 15 minute guided meditation by candlelight without feeling rushed
• writing my morning pages with a cup of peppermint tea
• leaving for work with a healthy lunch packed and a clear, doable list for my morning before work starts
• connecting with my team before the day begins
• going to the staffroom for recess and lunch
• getting into the woods every day
• yoga
• leaving work by 3:30 without so I have plenty of play time with my children
• time spent painting, writing and connecting with friends and family
• going for walks in the crisp fall air
• reading books
• time to connect and enjoy life with my husband

Chores - a poem, 2015

candlelight
no obligations or places to go
stocked pantry
plethora of options
                 freedom.

dirty washcloths
laundry waiting
new shoes to be bought
feeling distraught
lessons to be taught
     structure constricting
     responsibility overrated

chores -
    the word rings of sullen child
    responsibility
           asking to be forgotten

Vacation in the Valley

As the kids get older and I realize more and more how much I love adventuring with them, it is time to finally create a list of activities to do while visiting family in Agassiz so that we don't end up hanging out in the house all day, especially on rainy days like today.

Hiking:

Bridal Veil Falls: an oldy, but always a goody, especially for a picnic

Seven Sisters Trail

Not the first time I have tried to go on this trail, although I am pretty sure I walked it years ago.  It is a short, lush 3 km trail.

Teapot Hill: a 5 km round-trip trail at Cultus Lake.  This may be too long for Nico at this point, but perhaps a little food bribery may help?

Cheam Wetlands:  We have gone here often with my parents and family, but just a reminder to me for those days that I can't come up with anything.

Whipoorwill Point Trail, Harrison:
As a teenager we frequented this trail in the summer to go hang out at Sandy Beach.  It is probably too steep for Nico, but the 4km distance would be a nice afternoon date with Kai followed by ice cream in Harrison.

More to come next time!

Christmas List for the Family

Christmas Gift Ideas

• an aloe plant for my bedroom
• terrarium in glass (easy to maintain)...like this
• desk top lamp: Ikea Ekarp base and Ollsta lamp shade or something similar
• Blue House wooden lantern from Pier 1http://www.pier1.com/blue-house-wooden-lantern/3151552.html?cgid=lantern#nav=tile&icid=cat_lighting_candles-subcat_lighting-subcat_tile_lantern&start=1&sz=109&showAll=109
• non-tea light Candles (beeswax or vanilla; white or teal/light blue)
• natural looking candles..something like this at different heights
  
• casual short-sleeved tshirts (not fitted/snug)
• long sleeved tshirts or dress shirts
• full day babysitting so Marc and I can go snowboarding or snowshoeing
• snowshoe/fondue 'tour' evening
• silver hoop earrings (medium size or just not thin)

Today's Desire List: Sept 27, 2016

I desire...

for my body to feel 100% healthy
to walk in the forest

to cook a tasty dinner
to be at 100% sustained energy
to feel like my day has been perfect
fresh cut flowers
to be out of my head
to have a date night with Marc on Friday
to find and order a family pic with ease
warmth
ease
spaciousness
to connect with my boys today

to have fun with my boys
a clean computer
to receive a letter
to be clear on my birthday desires
to work 4 days a week maximum
to love every minute of my job
a toned, firm, strong, flexible body
a flat, strong stomach so I can wear snug clothing
a decorative rug on the wall like at Urban Healing

the best month of October ever

a day a month just for digestion/planning/writing - Me Day

New York City, Here I Come....Again

Yes, I have been the New York City many times now...6, I think, but for most of those visits I was hanging out and learning with Mama's Gena's School of Womanly Arts.  Yes, it sounds like I was learning to become a lady, perhaps walking with a book on my head, doing embroidery and practicing to set the table for company.  Although those are skills that may actually do me well, they are not even close to the amazing life lessons I learned and that is not the point in any case.  The point is that despite my many visits, NYC and I have yet to be truly acquainted.  This trip I have 4 1/2 days to see the beauty of this amazing city.  Here are some of the things I would like to experience:

Walk the Highline again:

I have seen promos for a past event called The Social Soup Experiment often done mid-October so am secretly hoping it will be while I am there!

Bike Ride Through Central Park:

I have seen much of the park but nothing seems more luxurious than biking through the park with a girlfriend, chatting casually, stopping for pictures or a bite to eat or a hot chocolate and breathing in the crisp autumn air.

Broadway Show:

Of course a trip to NYC must always include a show on Broadway or just off Broadway.  Last time I went Christy and I saw Daniel Radcliffe in The Cripple of Inishmann and had an amazing time.  Not on Broadway, the most interesting show I ever experienced was Sleep, No More which was interactive and incredible!  This year I think I would like to see Wicked.

Museum Visit:  MoMA

Something I have always missed is visiting one of the notable museums.  This time around I would like to start with the Museum of Modern Art.  Although the Met and the Guggenheim buildings are supposed to be incredible, I love modern art.  The thought of sitting and contemplating beautiful art quietly (with hundreds of others, of course) really sounds wonderful to me.

Eat at Eataly with a foodie

The first time I was in NYC I did a city bus tour to get the lay of the land.  One of our stops was a huge Italian market and I went camera happy.  The food, the displays, the atmosphere was incredible. This was the trip that my camera got left in a taxi after arriving home in Vancouver and I lost all the gorgeous pictures I had taken.  This time I want to return with my camera in hand but also with a foodie.  I know that the market could be a gastronomical dream but as someone who is intimated and overwhelmed by food itself, I would love to have someone with me ordering different types of food to try, all along with a nice glass of wine of course.

Most importantly, I want to enjoy girl time with these lovely ladies...

Nico: 11 Months

I recently found a journal entry, a list really, of what you were like at 11 months old.  My time to write and reflect about how amazing you are seems so limited, but at least we have this one.  Here we go, my happy boy:

• words: dada, nana (food), uh oh, hi (sometimes)
• like the slide, but swings go too fast for you
• you stand up holding on to things and can let go and be on your own for a good 10 seconds
• love climbing up stairs
• follow Kai everywhere, laughing at everything he does
• moving towards 1 nap a day, but right now you go between 4 and 4 1/2 hours between naps
• throw your head back and laugh
• love balls of all shapes and sizes
• easygoing with everyone; forever smiling
• wave in your own way - either with the whole arm facing forwards or turn your hand backwards to wave
• bite everything, including sometimes your brother
• becoming attached to your bedtime deer
• communicate very clearly when you don't want something - yell loudly or push it away
• beginning to enjoy feeding yourself
• whack your head on the back of the (padded) highchair when you are eating, having fun moving it across the room with your forceful body slams
• love music
• shake your head side to side very fast to make yourself dizzy
• flop your body and face into the mattress, looking for a reaction and trying to make us laugh
• want to be part of everything we do, especially meal times